Tuesday, October 16, 2012

I told him a really funny joke

Well.  Something weird has happened to me, you guys.  It happened to me on Saturday night and I wonder (if I may be so melodramatic) if I will ever be the same.
Every now and then, I go over to my sister, Renee's house to do my laundry.  She is kind enough to leave that service available to me and it's nice to go and see my little nephew Jagger.  He and I are like, best friends.  We sword fight, wrestle, I throw him higher into the air than most people are comfortable with; he loves me and I love him.  Here's a picture of he and I, right after I told him a really funny joke:
He's shirtless because he was busy being really awesome.
Anyway, Jagger hasn't ever inspired the thought or feeling of "Man, I want my own kids."  In fact, that thought hasn't ever come without being beckoned by some ornery and incredulous female companion.  Here's what I'm trying to say:  I haven't ever really, truly wanted kids.  I haven't ever had an interest in extending my lineage or living through them or blah blah blah whatever other stupid crap that people say about the matter.  But on Saturday, as I wrestled with him, I felt something.  I mean, I felt something.  Like some sort of bitter medicine, the thought "Maybe I would like this kind of bond, this kind of companionship in my life" came.  And, not only did it come, but it is lingering!  Lingering I say! It won't leave me.
The feeling has left me feeling terribly lonely, as well.  I've always been fine being alone.  I don't mind it and I actually kind of guard it rather jealously.  But this feeling takes me being alone and changes it to me being lonely.  My priorities are suddenly jumbled.  I have always had a plan and something going on; I've always known, kind of, exactly what I was doing and where I was going.  But now, I feel so... wayward.  ha ha ha.
My name is Andrew Keele and for the first time in my entire life, I'll admit it:  I want to have kids.
You don't understand, I bet.  I'm really more selfish than you think I am. Here are some things I want: to travel the world; to drive a nice, fast car; nice carpet and a studio downstairs, in my basement. Here are some things I don't want: to wake up at 6 am to make sure that my kids get to school; to wake up in the middle of the night to some screaming baby; to have to cancel a movie night or a night at a play because one of my kids is sick.
I could go on and on.  But here's the point:  for the first time, I find that the bond and love of and from children could outweigh all of those stupid, material things that I hold in such high regard.
What is happening to me?
this has been an insightful post.
I love you for reading.
Keep the faith.

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

maybe later on

Hey everybody.  It's been a minute, huh?  Lookit, here's the truth:  I don't have even five seconds to myself these days.  The last month has been just crazy and I'm running around like an idiot trying to do everything.  At this very instant, I'm typing to you, my faithful readers, while I should be making a time line that shows what was going on in George Wythe's life during the time of the founding of our great nation.  So... I'm sorry, okay?  I had a ton of free time during the summer, but with the dropping of the leaves and the mercury, my free time has diminished.  Just back up off of this.
I've had kind of a lot on my plate the last few months, you guys.  I've been spending my every weekend working on a web series called Grunt Slingers.  I have been going to school (to be honest, I go about fifty percent of the time.  I just hate it so much) and doing homework.  I'm working at the hale most nights, but when I'm not there, I'm working at my accursed job, Applebee's. 
School is almost over for me.  I can't wait to be free, but at the same time, it sort of scares the bejeezus out of me.  All of my carefully laid plans must come to fruition.  Or I must attempt to make them come to fruition.  ha ha ha.  We'll see what happens, I guess. 
Spain is out, you guys.  I'm not going.  I'm not going to explain myself on here, but it's out for the time being.  Maybe later on.  Plus, if I go and spend time in Europe, I kind of want to go everywhere.  I want to go to spain, italy, france (especially normandy) england, scotland, germany, blah blah blah.
Sometimes, I think about Germany.  I think about the Germans and how the populace at one point was like "yeah.  Yeah, all of Europe should speak German.  That's good.  Also, I like that idea about how everyone should have fair skin.  That's good, too."  I mean, what the crap??  I also think about bicycles and the history of them.  Who invented the bicycle?  Oh.  Wikipedia said that it was some German.  Go figure.
But you know what I mean?  I wonder if bikes were like X-boxes.  Maybe the unreal graphics can be compared to the fact that someone could move at high speeds while maintaining their balance.  "You what?! 15 miles per hour and you were riding around on just two wheels??  How did you sustain balance?"  I bet you, when the bicycle came out all those years ago, it was the bee's knees, man.
Okay.  That's it.  I'm all done talking to you fools.  It's friggin late, anyway. 

I love you for reading.
I'm trying to be like Jesus.